← Bigfoot is Your Landlord

When you return to consciousness, you cannot move. Your whole body is in pain. Fluorescent light shines in your eyes. The harsh light is soon eclipsed by the face of a harried nurse.

“I’m glad to see you’re awake,” the nurse smiles. “You were mauled by a bear. And boy, did it maul you up good!”

She holds up a hand mirror and sure enough, you’re covered head to toe in a full body cast. One of your legs is on a sling. It would be hilarious if you were Wile E. Coyote.

“A mysteriously hairy man left you at the hospital door. I didn’t catch his name, but in the shadows he grunted something about scaring away a bear, then having your pipes fixed,” the nurse explained.

Bigfoot saved your life. Noble creature, terrible landlord.

THE END